Redefining a DH

I am a DH in three roles - a Domestic Helper, a Diva Housewife, and a Dedicated Homemaker. The fourth role which i am totally not is a Desperate Housewife. Though i can much relate to Felicity Hoffman's role in that tv series i am not desperate because i am actually beyond that. :)
If only i can just be Dumb and Happy (DH too, huh?). I am one Deranged Housewife. God help me. I need Divine Help.